It strikes me that your comfort level as a parent - with milestones, child care, other parents, everything, is dictated by the age of your oldest child, meaning the longer you have been a parent, the more comfortable you are.
This is probably not news to anyone, but I am just figuring it out. I have a had a number of experiences where another parent of a child Casey's age will talk about things their child is doing or saying or being allowed to do, and I think "Really? They're only 6!" These parents are less concerned about where their kid is at a given moment, or unphased by an injury. And I have been aware that that 6 year old is not the oldest and gets to do things because they have older siblings. I have had the same thought about Sam - he does things now, at 4, that Casey did not do at 4, because he has an older brother.
This became clear to me though recently through some interactions with the parents of Sam's preschool friends. These 4 years old are the first borns and now I look like the relaxed one - not too worried where exactly Sam is for a minute and not needing a ton of precise info in order to book a play date.
I don't think I am explaining it very well but it felt like a big realization to me. I like things that make other people make more sense to me :)
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